Truth From My Lungs

I've had the strangest night. It is snowing where I am. At the moment it would seem I haven't felt like this since my last night in Cabo. I remember the sea roaring, a storm was coming in, from what people told me that day. I had the privilege of watching the moon take it's place among the stars. I watched it rise from the ocean to the center sky. I observed it change colors; from red, to orange, and then to yellow. I can't remember ever in my life being that close to heaven. I remember thinking I would never again feel this, I would never again capture a moment like this. Alas, December 24th, 2:30 AM, I found myself staring at a similar scene.

I opened the door to my best friends house, the cold was instant. It froze me up, but that isn't what stalled me. The ground, the rooftops, the sidewalk, and pavement were painted white. Snow fell all around and suddenly the cold fled from my bones. I've been listening to a song I recently received from Matt Alsanian, our producer. In my last entry I spoke of the song, "When You're Not Around"; well I had this song in my ears as I left my friends house. I stepped along the sidewalk, and then across the pavement, towards my car. Something made me stop and look back. I could see my foot prints in the snow. They left a perfect impression of what was on my mind. I gazed at the scene before me and couldn't help but sense the irony in me singing "give me the street signs, give me the hours as I retrace the steps that I have devoured." At that moment I took a deep breath, but I did not exhale for fear I'd lose the moment; and in that moment I stooped down and traced a heptagon in the street, and thought about the people in my life. The people that keep me seeing my breath in the atmosphere. In that moment I felt complete again. Over the last year I struggled with being an honest man in the most dishonest time of life. I thought of all the things I've spoken, and pondered if my words were a farce. The truth is, these songs, this album, is the only honest thing I've done in my whole life. From "The Hour Is Late" to "10 Years". Every word I've sung has been a little part of me. The only parts of me I've cared to keep.

In the end, I am thankful for my friends, family, and for those who inspire truth from my lungs.